


Neo got my back

by zelosthighs



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Crack, Fluff, I Don't Even Know, M/M, NSFW maybe, Social Media, Texting, convos my friends and i actually have, dotae are bestfriends, jaehyun is doyoungs baby
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-30
Updated: 2019-11-30
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:01:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21624961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zelosthighs/pseuds/zelosthighs
Summary: tyongie:if you two dont stop I'll take away jaehyundyoungie: I'd like to see you try, bitch.badbabybitch:taeyong just tried to tackle doyoung and??? Doyoung just tripped him and is now sitting on himcnehle:127 dorm wildbigfootsexy:is it weird that I'm strangely arousedbabysquatch:lele that's our cue to...bleach our eyes
Relationships: Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul | Ten/Qian Kun, Dong Si Cheng | WinWin/Moon Taeil, Dong Si Cheng | WinWin/Nakamoto Yuta, Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Lee Taeyong, Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung/Suh Youngho | Johnny, Kim Jungwoo/Wong Yuk Hei | Lucas, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee, Park Jisung/Zhong Chen Le
Comments: 2
Kudos: 56





	1. Haechan please

**Author's Note:**

> tyongie: taeyong  
> dyoungie:doyoung  
> badbabybitch:haechan  
> badbitch:ten  
> oldiebutgoldie:kun  
> bigfootsexy:johnny  
> cnehle:Chenle  
> babysquatch:jisung  
> narutorun:yuta  
> Mork:mark  
> wonwon:winwin  
> taelien/toelien: taeil  
> wonderbread:jaehyun  
> shibajenu:jeno  
> nananana:jaemin  
> salt:renjun

badbabybitch created a chat  
badbabybitch added tyongie,wonderbread,taelien +17more  
badbabybitch named the chat to NeoGotMyBack

badbabybitch:if you had to choose which my little pony would you be 

tyongie: hyuck please its 4 am 

bigfootsexy: no wait let's hear him out 

badbabybitch:I personally think I'd be princess luna 

badbabybitch: and with that said Ten hyung is princess celestia 

cnehle: dreamies + yanyang cutie mark crusaders 😎

bigfootsexyt: mark derpy hooves [confirmed] 

cnehle: doyoung hyung is totally twilight sparkle!!! 

badbitch: because hes a huge fucking nerd 

bigfootsexy: hey! doie isn't that much of a nerd 

badbitch: stop being a suck up suh he's a nerd 

dyoungie: fuck you chittaphon I'm not a nerd 

dyoungie: also Johnny's Big Mcintosh

wonderbread: ah the strong silent type eh 

babysquatch: !!! Jeno !!!! Fluttershy!!!! 

cnehle:lucas hyung is rainbowdash!!! 

tyongie: guys please I want to sleep 

badbabybitch: y'all hear smth 

tyongie:hyuck I swear to god if you dont stop this conversation now, no more Mark for a week 

badbabybitch:you cant take away my Mork privileges!!! 

bigfootsexy:i- he really came and took Mark. 

tyongie: you can have this back when you stop talking and sleep 

badbabybitch: you can't do this to me! now what am I supposed to do!!!

bigfootsexy: he was staring at mark sleep and taking pictures of him

dyoungie: are we also not going to acknowledge that they're talking about mark like he's an object? 

tyongie:if you two dont stop I'll take away jaehyun 

dyoungie: I'd like to see you try, bitch. 

badbabybitch:taeyong just tried to tackle doyoung and??? Doyoung just tripped him and is now sitting on him 

cnehle:127 dorm wild 

bigfootsexy:is it weird that I'm strangely aroused 

babysquatch:lele that's our cue to...bleach our eyes 

babysquatch:night guys!! 

badbabybitch:doyoung is lanky but damn can he hold his ground 

bigfootsexy:hell yeah he can ;) 

badbabybitch: I'm- gonna go sneak mark out

bigfootsexy:guess I'll get doie off of tae 

dyoungie:try that again noodle bitch I dare you! 

dyoungie:next time he wont be there to stop me!!! 

_______________

narutorun:yo wtf happened last night 

mork:I thought hyung pulling me out of bed was a dream….

mork:and that hyuck was the knight who rescued me 

shibajenu:me?? Fluttershy? I'm 🥰

narutorun:are you going to ignore that he was staring at you sleep? 

mork:yeah but he does that like all the time haha

narutorun:that?? doesnt?? make?? it??? better???

badbabybitch:says the guy who keeps touching winwin toes 

wonwon:no that's taeil he wont leave me alone 

[badbabybitch changed taeliens username]

toelien:you know what? I ain't even mad 

wonwon:also why was doyoungie being so protective of jaehyun 

wonwon:he's yongies boyfriend 

dyongie:that doesn't change the fact that hes my baby 

bigfootsexy:yeah doie is strangely overprotective of jae

bigfootsexy:even tho hes my bffff 

oldiebutgoldie:bffff?

wonderbread:best friend forever forever forever!! 

tyongie:jaehyuns been having sleepovers with johndo

tyongie:its been...3 days please give him back 

dyongie:I'll take it into consideration 

bigfootsexy:bun please it's been ages since we had any alone time 

bigfootsexy:its been AGES since I've gotten you to myself 

tyongie:yeah go spoil noren 

salt:bold of you to assume hes not doing it rn 

shibajenu:yeah!! doyoungie hyung took us out to eat!! 

bigfootsexy:am, am I the only one not being spoiled by MY boyfriend 

bigfootsexy:that's homophobic 

dyongie:yuta said if I tried to go near you he was going to bite me! 

narutorun:hes my man now 

narutorun:and we're going to to on cute bike ride dates and grow old together 

nanananana:hey that's mine and jenos brand

narutorun:we're older we can do whatever we want 

toelien:oh worm this means winwin is all mine 

narutorun:did I say grow old together? that's gay i dont even like johnny

narutorun:speaking of johnny who is that anyways? 

bigfootsexy:😟

_________________

dyongie:I just got back and Johnny's sitting in his room in the dark 

dyongie:listening to old avril lavigne songs 

bigfootsexy:shes the only one who understands me!!! 

mork:yo I cant believe ur listening to her without me!

wonderbread:get in line Markus that should be me!

dyongie:too bad hes coming with me and we're gonna listen to MCR instead 

tyongie:we going ✈ emo hours? 

narutorun:with Johnny it never stopped 

bigfootsexy:like u have any room to talk! 

bigfootsexy:ur obsessed with evanescence and three days grace!!! 

bigfootsexy:not to mention all the jrock!!!

narutorun:THE GAZETTE IS MY PASSION AND NO ONE CAN TAKE THEM AWAY FROM ME 

toelien:what are u guys talking about why did it make yuta hiss 

wonwon:yuta furry [confirmed]

toelien:yiff yiff bitch 

tyongie:everyday i question their relationship 

toelien:u just wish it relationship was this spicey 🤪😩✊

____________

oldiebutgoldie:s i g h


	2. Black market

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yangles:yangyang   
> oldiebutgoldie:kun  
> cnehle:chenle   
> monsterhands:Lucas   
> Salt:renjun   
> angel:xiaojun   
> badbabybitch:haechan  
> mork:mark  
> bigfootsexy:johnny  
> nanananana:jaemin   
> Wigglewaggle:hendery  
> tyongie:taeyong  
> dyoungie:doyoung   
> narutorun:yuta

Yangles:apparently bone marrow is worth 23,000$ a gram 

Yangles:and we have about 5.7 lbs in our bodies 

Yangles:thats like 63,000,000$

Yangles:just sitting here

Yangles:In my bones 

yangles: Being usless

Oldiebutgoldie: i tried so hard with you 

Yangles:bro i could be rich 

angel:yang yang please 

yangles:let's sell our organs on the black market! 

yangles:we could be rich!!!! 

salt:so is this what I'm missing in the wayv dorm? 

salt:bc I am very much interested in becoming richer 

cnehle:i would say same but we all know I'm already pretty stinking rich 😎

monsterhands:omg we could sell chenle on the black market!!! 

wigglewaggle:hes right!! 

wigglewaggle:and if that doesnt work let's just kidnap him and ask for the ransome!!!!

cnehle:lucas hyung!!!! I thought you liked me 😔

monsterhands:dont take this personal lele

monsterhands:we just want to be rich 

oldiebutgoldie:okay that's it! no ones selling organs OR chenle 

salt:damn we were so close 

yangles:its okay kuns bedtime is at like 4 after then we can do whatever we want 

oldiebutgoldie:im not that old!!! 

yangles:whatever you say, oldman 

___________

tyongie:kun are you okay over there 

wonderbread:yeah his kids make haechan look like an angel 

badbabybitch:I AM: an angel 

badbabybitch: just ask @mork! 

mork:yeah yeah baby the cutest little angle 

nananana:i- he really said he could be his devil or his angle 

mork:is that not what he said? 

bigfootsexy: ANGEL mark ANGEL 

mork:pfffttt wtf is an angel that's a weird thing to say 

angel:is he pretending or is he really just that dumb?

mork:oh shit so your angel? so like it is real?

angel:mark no- 

angel:you know what yes that's me, I'm angel. 

mork:oh sweet dude I think hyuckie is looking for you 

badbabybitch:I'm just 

badbabybitch:I need to not be here 

bigfootsexy:mark I love you, but what the actual fuck 

_________

babysquatch:did anyone else get the vlive notification 

nanananana:yeah its jeno he decided to do that vlive with yang yang 

angel:they wanted to see how long they could last until one of the staff members caught on

salt:i- it didnt take very long they're running now 

cnehle:I can literally hear yangyang screaming 

oldiebutgoldie:why did I just click vlive only to be greeted by yangyang amd jeno running and screaming 

cnehle:legends only 

wigglewaggle: jeno and yangyang said fuck SM lives 

angel:and I respect that 

wonwon:dream and wayv interactions 

wonwon: SM would never 😩

salt:omg yangyang tripped and jeno really said who's that 

wigglewaggle:omg king he went back to drag yangyang with him 

tyongie:WHAT IS JENO DOING 

dyoungie:LOOK AT MY BABY BOY GO! BREAKING THE RULES GIVING US THE CONTENT WE NEED 

*40 minutes later*

angel:I cant believe jeno and yangyang ran out to the top of the building 

angel:I just hear the staff screaming and running around 

angel:check the fucking app u absolute buffoons 

angel:oh okay they're finally ending the live 

angel:they're unlocking the door omg I've never seen so many staff members run through a door 

angel:ommmg jeni and yangyang posing with peace signs and ending the live 

angel:legends absolute legends 

__________

narutorun:I cant believe this all happened and I wasnt here to witness it 

bigfootsexy:jeno and yangyang mad lads ✊✊

**Author's Note:**

> so heres the first attempt of trying to write a chat fic  
> maybe this will help me write a lot more who knows  
> but i'm gonna do my best 
> 
> stan johndo


End file.
